Princess Charming

Humorous enough to keep…and now to share….

Child – If sleeping beauty was sleeping why did the prince kiss her?

Mum – Maybe he was a date rapist honey, or just a lonely desperado like princess charming

Child – Who is princess charming?

Mum – Well once upon a time there lived a princess charming named heather.  Just like prince charming princess charming had a weakness for sleeping beauties.  Her favourite was Cindy who she kissed many times hoping she would awaken

Child – So she was a date rapist

Mum – Only men are date rapists honey.  As the girls grew older princess charming grew more desperate to wake her sleeping beauty, but Cindy never woke up.  Until one fateful day Cindy opened her eyes and said “Princess charming you are an ugly toad and you don’t have a pee pee, I want a real prince”

I am starting to think if my own mum had told me this story as child my life may well have played out somewhat different….or maybe not.

Cynical Cat Hater no.3…..Run Santa Run

CCH here is some more good in the world…

December 2010, in London’s Battersea Park more than 1,200 Santa’s ran, walked or wheeled themselves around 6k route in order to raise funds for Disability Snowsport UK.  Snowsport enable people to enjoy the thrill of snow sports regardless of disability.  The Santa’s were set off by Paralympian Tim Farr of the British Disabled Ski Team.  Disability Snowsport have, over the last year, opened 3 new adaptive ski schools in Hemel Hempstead, Milton Keynes and Tamworth

On a lighter note

Yes this is the women with the longest legs in the world meeting the smallest man in the world. I still laugh every time I look at this photo. I would like to thank the person that brought these two beings together

First rant…What are the BBC thinking??

The BBC’s, in their wisdom, decided to interview Stephen Green the right-wing fundamentalist Christian on his opinion of Sir Elton John and David Furnish becoming parents.  This is the same Mr Green who in 2009 supported a proposed death penalty for gay men in Uganda saying: “The contrast between our politicians and those of Uganda could not be more stark. A Parliamentarian in Uganda is trying to protect his nation’s children. The House of Commons of the United Kingdom is trying to corrupt ours. Which country is the more civilised, I wonder, in the eyes of Almighty God?”

Now after taking a deep breath I still find myself burning with rage.  You will of course be shocked to hear that Mr Green did not send his heart-felt best wishes to Elton and David.  I understand that many people will have their differing views on this topic, and I am all for hearing both sides of the debate but really BBC having a hateful, hateful person who has such extreme views to comment on a topic which you KNOW he is going to be extremely negative about and make disgusting comments in relation to is just foolish.

What amuses me about this is how the BBC seem to have forgotten that in 2007 Mr Green attempted to bring a private prosecution against the director general of the BBC for the broadcast of ‘Jerry Springer: The Opera’ saying it was blasphemous.  In 2008 he likened Ian Watkins (H, off of Steps) to mass murder Jeffrey Dahmer!!!  As irritating as the man might be this is extreme in anyones eyes.

He also criticised former Welsh Rugby Captain, Gareth Thomas, for becoming  a patron of the LGBT history month saying: “Gareth Thomas is urging such children to identify themselves as homosexual, and to inhibit their normal development into heterosexuality. That is a wicked thing to do to impressionable young people. The Lord Jesus Christ spoke about millstones being tied around the necks of those who lead children astray.”

I think I must have misinterpreted this support as urging…If Mr Green had any understanding of what it is like to be part of the homosexual world he would appreciate that there is certainly no form of urging, only attempts to support people (whatever age) to deal with something that is happening in their life, something that was never a choice and something that people like him make far more difficult that it should be.

If it is not upsetting enough that people like this exist in the world the BBC have made fools of themselves in asking him to comment on such a topic, and it is no wonder actors such as Richard Chamberlin are advising gay actors to stay in closet.  I was saddened when I saw this headline, and enraged when I saw the BBC’s.

It makes you wonder if anyone would want to bring children into a world like this.  I guess I can except that there will always be people in the world with these extreme views, for whatever reasons, but the BBC thrusting these views into the limelight I can’t understand.  So much more I could say but it feels some what futile so I leave on this note

ERGH………..!

Cliché fears

Wanting to put my feelings into words while desperately fighting the cliché I am afraid of becoming

Cynical Cat Hater… no.2

People will always be writing headlines like this….

Hey Snow White….

The new pornographers say ‘It’s going to be alright’ and whenever I listen to this song I believe them.

I guess there are times we all wonder if it really will be ok, but I think the key is to knowing eventually it will be.  As hard as things get, there will be some light at the end of the tunnel.  I’d ask you to look at where you were this time last year, or the year before and think of all that you have achieved in that time.  How you have developed and personally grown.  Not the things you lost but the ones you have gained.

Yes we sit, bitch and moan about the world but we are here in it, living it and we have so much left to live.  So many stupid things to laugh at, cry about, laugh at more and I’m to do it with you.  Cynical Cat Hater (CCH as you will be known from now) I say to you, don’t forget where you were 2 years ago and don’t forget where you are now.  To all my friends who have had more than their fair share of shit this year, we are still here and we are even funnier than we were before and life is forever funnier and we are kicking life’s ass even if it gets a left hook in every now and then.

Anyway remember reality is a good place for a holiday but I wouldn’t want to live there….so lets just leave whenever we need.

Cynicism killed the Cat hater….no.1

After hours sat in the pub putting the world to rights, it became somewhat apparent that there seemed little positive in the world that we found ourselves discussing.  My cat hating friend (one of the topics of rantings) challenged me to name something positive happening in the world and following my shocking ‘oh shit I’ve just been put on the spot without thinking this through’ moment I came up with having me as a friend.  Yes really that is how low I had to go.  So the challenge is now to prove to my cynical friend that there is some good in the world, that people still do nice things for each other and just maybe there is reason (other than laughing at my face) to smile.

1. On 27th December 2010 in Oklahoma a calf stranded on a frozen pond, was saved by a rancher and a rescue helicopter.  Instead of standing and laughing at the poor Bambi like skating calf, these people took it upon themselves to save the poor fellow.

I doubt this will have created a great warm glow within you all, but we are just warming up………

The Facts of Life…..as described by Black Box Recorder

Hello world!

Pub rantings and friend pressures result in new blog…..

Mission 1. To rant

Mission 2. To prove to my cynical friend there is good in the world

Mission 3. To rant

Mission 4. To empty my head