Oh Furby

Furby – So there’s this girl who I have a massive crush on, standard, and she offered to give me a lift to the station tonight.  Obviously I jumped at the chance, and while in the car launched into standard small talk by asking what she does for a living.  ‘I run a personal training business’ she said, and showed me her card with the website on it, ‘you should have a look’.  Instead of responding with something supportive or witty (either would have been appropriate), I came out with ‘nice URL‘. What is wrong with me?

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Furby – Most depressing email ever: ‘Diva magazine is now following you on Twitter‘

Lowry – hahahahahahhahahahahahahahjajahajahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahahahjajahahahahahahahhaa *breath* hahahapapphhhhaanahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha

Furby – Knob

Mini Gay Girlfriend

Cave Woman – Hahaha I have a new app for you called ‘mini gay girlfriend’
I’ve called my mini gf Penny

MOMENTS LATER

CW – Penny is frigid, I’ve given her loads of hugs and kisses and she still won’t go on a date with me. I have to wait a few hours. It’s a lesbian tamagochi pet, I’ll probably forget to feed her and she’ll die

Me – Maybe you are too keen, you can’t kill Penny off.

****A DAY LATER****

Me – I have myself a ‘mini gay girlfriend’ called Florence. She won’t date me…she thinks I’m rushing things. I though that’s what lesbian where in to

CW – Penny is frigid too, although I do get loads of snogs. Surely i should get a date first

Me – Yeah I reckon so. This is kind of true to life

CW – I’m going to try her now

Me – Tap that. Florence told me to try again in a few hours. She’s trying to play it cool

CW – She’s dating me! Woo!

Me – Congrats. You should probably change your Facebook status