More ‘Wise’ Words From Cavewoman

CW – It’s always great to start a new relationship by imagining someone else when you are having sex

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In relation to Channel 4’s Living with the Amish

CW – I wouldn’t mind the lifestyle but i’d still want to go out on a Friday get totally fucked up and shag someone

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CW – How do ugly people get pregnant and have children?

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The little conversation had while watching ITV’s A Night With Beyonce (the family version!)

CW – Mate, wait for this bit

Lowry – Fuck me

CW – Oh my god

Lowry  – Quick rewind it…REWIND IT!

CW – mmmmmmmm

Lowry – Shit

CW – Can we watch that bit again?

Lowry – YES!

CW – Ergggg

Lowry – Are you drooling?

Lowry – This is insane

CW – She has fat knees like me – she’s brilliant

Lowry – Curving hell

Lowry – Did you see THAT!

CW – Oh gwaddd

CW – Shall we watch it again?

Lowry – alright

The Biggest Loser

While watching the final of The Biggest Loser on ITV…

HM3 – What’s the point, what do they win?

Me – Their health?!

After finding out there is a large sum of money to be won..

HM3 – I bet they pile on the weight just to get on the show

ME – This women is really amazing, she has totally changed her life to achieve her goal

HM1 – She goes to the gym everyday

HM3 – For now

ME – She is now an aerobics instructor

HM3 – For now

HM1 – She quit her job so she could take it really seriously, train and change her life

HM3 – what was her job..a cake tester?

My Special Friends

From today, 3rd January 2011, I shall share with you some of the rather spectacular and somewhat hilarious words of wisdom to escape the mouths of my very special group of friends.  I feel enough time has passed in which I have smuggled these special moments away to keep for myself only to raise from the depth of my memory (where many bits of vital information are disregarded in order to make room for these comical moments) when I’m in need a good laugh….

An example of theses pearls of wisdom came from my beautiful housemate last night.  While watching the inspirational, and somewhat life changing, film Paul Blart: Mall Cop (don’t judge me) in particular a scene in which Paul Blart spreads peanut butter over a pie prior to eating it (no really the storyline is that compelling) our conversation went something like this:-

Housemate 1 – Do you think people really eat Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches

Me – Yes, it’s quite popular in America

HM 1 – Eww…..

ME – I know I don’t really see the appeal

Pause

HM 1 – But how do they put jelly on bread?

Me – You do understand that American‘s call jam jelly, right?

Silence

HM1- Oh

I love her….

Conversation between my other housemates

HM3 – ‘HM2 are you watching porn again

HM2 – ‘If ITV news is porn, then I’m guilty’

Tune in next time for more special and comical moments…..